Are you there God? It’s me, Jen…

Did you read that Judy Blume book when you were a teen?  Are you there God?  It’s me Margaret… I was living on the edge reading that racy book.  Which in 2020 would constitute roughly a Grade 3 education resource.  How times have changed.  But one thing does not change.. asking God if He is there. 

All through the ages people have turned to God in crisis, in celebration, in mourning, or the odd person turns to God as a friend. I’d like to think I’m that latter.  That I walk each day as God’s sidekick.  He’s my bestie.  I’d like to think we are on such good terms that I always ‘know’ He’s listening to me.  My reality is a little different.  My day is usually littered with distraction.  My intention is excellent.  And then the sun comes up.  I’m back on the roller coaster.  From kids to work to cooking to friends to love… I used to think I was pretty good at setting boundaries.  But I have witnessed some boundary bosses.

Truthfully they bump into my rejection wound.   What?  You won’t tell me that secret when I just told you mine?  You don’t have half an hour to chat when I just invited you to a 4 hour coffee last week?  Thanks!  Really it’s conflicting.  On one hand I am offended and make a mental note not to share as much with that person next time.  On the other hand I envy that person for the courage to be real and for unapologetically setting their boundary.

As I’m writing I am realizing this falls on me.  God has been there the whole time.  God does not move, I move.